The original short entry under this heading was expanded by its contributors into a fascinating discussion, with a chain of rivetting exposés. I have copied the entire text here. More comments are invited; this is merely an act of consolidation which I have limned with apposite pictorial matter
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It all began with a dialogue between Bruce Helman and Paul Feldman:
Re the STHS website and blog:
I think I must have been a dull student in a bright school but there was lots of fun. The description of Mark [Ierace] is perfect.
I was in the Barney McGuire class and well remember the battleship day. I did not remember the "symmetry" reason behind the lesson but the drawings did illustrate that by demonstrating the difference between the normal battleship and the cut down ships built because of the treaty after WW1, ie Hood 2 turrets fore and aft v Rodney designed with 3 turrets fore and aft but completed with 3 turrets fore and cut off immediately after main superstructure. The lesson was learnt but not in the way intended.
I probably have to thank Barney for giving me such a poor grounding in English that I became something other than my then preferred English/History teacher. I also spent a lot of time "discussing" the Vietnam war with Mark Ierace, he argued for it at that time or he spent a lot of time winding me up.
Geoff Kerr
I found the site by searching Geoff Kerr Sydney Tech High. I was a good friend of Geoff’s during 64 – 68.
Geoff did create and run the “Bing must go” campaign. He typed them individually on a manual typewriter, cut them up into small strips and gave them to people to stick up. They had a sticky back that was easy to strip off and slap them on a wall. He also had links to Barney McGuire, I think in '66 one of the Sth Hurstville crowd used to get his father's car out of the garage late at night (no licence) and drive around to collect a few mates including Geoff. One night they went to Barney McGuire's in the E suburbs and either deposited certain substances or made noise etc. Barney came out, got the number of the car and there was a certain amount of trouble. Geoff was also involved in the “great lolly robbery” of 65 or 66 when they pinched boxes from the truck behind the canteen. He also used Condy's crystals/glycerine to set delayed fires in the bins in the basement. The whole basement was filled with smoke and smelt of burnt food scraps. He also unbolted the hooter in the basement one Wednesday afternoon when sport was on and threw it in the incinerator.
Bing was the only one to give me the cane.
In 5th or 6th year not sure which but probably 6th our class had a double [period] over Recess and Assembly. Because the doors in the new block could be locked, the last one out before recess would lock the door.
Everybody would then come back and muck around after outside the room until a key was found. After a few weeks Bing came storming down, demanded that someone own up or we would all be caned. No one did so he lined us up and proceeded to cane us all. He had good stamina but was flagging by the end of the 20+.
Peter Stroud was in a nearby room and told me that the class went quiet after the 6 or 7th stoke and the teacher went out and came back and reported incredulously “He’s got them all lined up and is caning them all”.
Regards
Bruce Helman
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Ah, it's good to get confirmation of a long-held theory - I always thought it was Geoff.
And the hooter in the incinerator...what a work of art!
The new block was a place of eeriness and torment. The worst of 60s public architecture: a redbrick box with concrete wind tunnels, thrown up quickly and positioned to cast maximum shadow.. Costello called it Siberia, not without bitterness. For years the maths staff had returned a week early from their summer holidays to draw up a timetable that had to work within the confines of the existing accommodation. Costello was a Japanese codebreaker in WWII, but the Wyndham scheme with its extra year made the timetabling exercise impossible. Hence the new block....
Mention of Peter Stroud... he had a good line in sectarian anecdotes. I remember him describing a typical Catholic church service where people turned up still drunk from the night before, hung their heads out of the church windows and vomited. I was particularly impressed when he said that the Minister of his congregation (Methodist?) made a joke about Sampson slaying the Philistines with the arsebone of a Jew. As a child of non-religious parents, I grew up thinking I had to be unusually respectful towards other people's religious inclinations. Anecdotes like Peter's, and encounters with the strange gentlemen who delivered the C of E scripture classes, had me feeling much more at ease with my dad's atheism.
The story I heard about the midnight visit to the Eastern suburbs had them calling out 'Barney McGuire, stop rooting your wife....'
Paul Feldman
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The debating team
I have a recollection of a debate held in the Auditorium concerning the Yellow Peril or the Domino Theory or the Threat from the North, maybe the merits of Vietnam. I don’t know who it was against but I’m sure it was you lot.
You were in opposition and the affirmative opening or second speaker started with a diatribe about the threat to us all and the swiftness that the hordes would overtake us.
Whoever spoke next started with something along the lines of “if the invasion is that fast they will overshoot and all end up drowned in the ocean”
It brought the house down at the time but I don’t know if it won you the debate.
Also Nancy Wake spoke once at assembly, was it the Kingsford Smith lecture or something like that.
Satchell did the timetable in Y12, I learnt how to count to 21 by playing pontoon while he was out of class for weeks sorting it out.
I’d say it was our Methodist scripture teacher (Rev from Arncliffe) he was a bit unorthodox. Peter is still somewhat irreverent and living in Nambucca Heads.
Bruce Helman
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Bruce, good to hear from you.
That's a great line, and I have a vague recollection of that debate, but not being part of it. You'd have to be pretty relaxed (or completely freaked out) to come up with a crowd pleaser like that.
I had two solo public speaking ordeals in the auditorium when I was in first and second form. The first one was won by John Irish who delivered an amazingly well prepared talk on the Royal Auto Club, in his (sort of) Cockney accent. Unbelievably, as you might have heard, he died of pneumonia the year after leaving school. The second one was won by a kid called Bill Kennaugh who made a joke about garbagemen's singlets turning black by the end of the day. You had to be there ... it was all in the timing.
I was in one in second form on school uniforms against a team that included John Hamilton (another South Hurstville boy). He was arguing for school uniforms, but the poor fellow was wearing brown shoes and blue socks so we had no mercy.
John later became a good friend, and I wonder what happened to him. His father was English master at another high school. He had that in common with Trevor Reidy, whose father taught at Hurstville High. For years poor Trevor had to travel to school with his father on the bus. They sat next to each other, with identical short haircuts.
Then I think in Third Form, I was made the moderator for a debate in the auditorium that took place in front of the history classes. I had the cringe-making experience of having Brian Hodge stand up at one point, make an apology to me for interrupting, and then proceed to throw out about half a dozen kids for making animal noises.
Yes, I remember Nancy Wake talking and I think you're right, it was a K-S event. Bong was actually pretty good at getting big name speakers to the school. At the end of '64 he had the manager of the Olympic team talk at Speech Night. [The manager] started defending his actions in sending Dawn Fraser back for stealing a Japanese flag, and got hissed by the audience.
But we trumped Bong in '68 by bringing Ted Noffs in to talk to the Socratic Society. As he was leaving, Noffs got accosted by Ray Hau, the Chinese maths teacher, who was arguing with him about using social work to push Christianity. Then Satchell came up and ordered RH to cease and desist, and go to his class. I don't know if it was the disorder or Ray Hau's atheism that pissed him off more. Satchell was a Salvationist and used to dress up in uniform and play drums in one of their bands.
In some ways the rest of my life has been an anti climax.
Paul Feldman
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17/11/2008 - RE: John Hamilton
Posted by Pearsall
John Hamilton is an anaesthetist working at Kogarah & living in the Shire.
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2/12/2008 - Geoff Kerr's diversions
Posted by Anonymous
I nowhere see the word 'alleged' in the description of events attributed to Geoff Kerr. My recollection is that the late night visitors allegedly found numerous empty long necks at the McGuire residence and lined them up on the front doorstep. Unfortunately there was a clanking noise that caused Barney to come to the door, stumble over the used glassware and catch a glimpse of the numberplate of a vehicle allegedly driven by one Greg Churm rapidly leaving the scene. Police managed to access Motor Transport records and attended the school to deliver stern warnings on the basis of the vehicle being registered to a Mrs Churm. Naturally one of the lads was expelled from the Air Cadets on the basis of these allegations. The 'stop rooting your wife' comment is spurious to my knowledge.
At the boundary of the school stood a magnificent pine tree and on the final day of school for the class of '68 this tree was adorned with banners reading 'Bing Go' and 'Bong Go' allegedly raised by person or persons from the Childs family.
3/12/2008 - Bingo Bongo
Posted by Anonymous
Looking at the 1967 Journal it is obvious that Bing did go and so the banner attributed to the Childs family was simply Bong Go.
Paul Feldman's contributions are a joy to read.
Gumby comments: I remember this event clearly: there was only one sign, which read 'BONG-GO'.
Feldman's writings are indeed a joy to read.
The tall pines have gone... As Google Earth reveals.
4/12/2008 - Re: Geoff Kerr's diversions
Posted by Paul Feldman
The account posted above by Anonymous has the awkward ring of truth about it. As for 'Barney McGuire, stop rooting your wife', spurious is a great word, and probably correctly applied here.
The boy now credited with leading this deed was said to be an enthusiastic driver. His family owns a business that supplies large-print books to libraries. On the other hand, Ferrier, who poured itching powder down my pants, is now a forensic accountant...
5/12/2008 - Old memories
Posted by Hunkamunka
I guess the cat is out of the bag. The statute of limitations hopefully protects the guilty. Geoff Kerr is alive and kicking. These days he is an environmental scientist in semi-retirement.
The Tom Thumb play is my only foray into cross-dressing and I can still vividly remember Ann Jennings applying the cold cream to my face. Maybe that is why I have sported a beard for most of my adult life.
First a little housekeeping. having perused the bulk of the blog there are a couple of points to make. I think that Steven Edgar was the hapless poet bedded by Ann, I clearly remember visiting her Paddington abode while I was associated with the Push to find her sitting up in bed with a callow youth.
In regard to the forensic accountant his name is Ian whereas the Journal lists three ferrets with the initials R, M and J. Which one is practicing for his future calling by pouring irritants into people's pants?
Who remembers the catacombs? By entering the showers under the auditorium one could gain access through a wooden door to the bowels of the structure and proceed past many brick peers to the under-slab areas of Bing's and Bong's offices. While seated on a rude earth floor with candle lit one could examine primitive anatomical diagrams of the male and female genitalia drawn with lamp black and read the protestations of former students. What a satisfying cigarette was enjoyed directly beneath the stern flagellists seated immediately above.
The shower area from which one entered this netherworld was odd in that it was constructed like a cattle dip with a long blank shield wall along the outside with entry only at each end. Did anyone use this shower or its associated change room?
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| Bong's original quarterdeck, circa 1960. Recently flogged ratings are shown limping away from the lashing triangles; smoke curls from the louvres as a shaman outlines another mastodon on the walls within. |
6/12/2008 - The Catacombs of Bexley North
Posted by Paul Feldman
Twas a lesser ferret than Ian, name of Rod. These days he inhabits loftier burrows, namely those at Level 5, 50-54 York Street. Sydney NSW 2000. Tel 02 9279 0722. Fax 02 9279 0765 Ring him up and ask. Actually the deed took place in the grounds of Hurstville Primary School in 1961, near the trees on the southern boundary. I looked around and there he was, laughing his head off.
Speaking of burrows, that stuff about the catacombs is amazing. Even if untrue, it ought to be more generally known. This is an archaeological site to rival Lascaux. A sheep dip shower you say...
6/12/2008 - catacombs
Posted by Geoff Kerr
Most certainly this is true. Wish I could remember who would be able to confirm their existence. Such a journey is not taken alone. Sort of an in-house version of a Hill End excursion. The entry point within the shower race could be seen a kind of behind the waterfall experience.
Point taken about Rod, PhD and all. It takes a smart arse rather than a smarting arse (spell checker must be US, does not like arse) to linger so long in academia.
7/12/2008 - Catacombs
Posted by A Mole
Recent finds from the catacombs
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| September 2006: Bong's quarterdeck has been deleted. Does the decorated grotto remain beneath? Captain, art thou sleepin' there below? |
1 Prompted by the demolition of Bong’s veranda, an archaeological expedition into the catacombs of STHS has revealed a number of interesting artefacts.
2 Human remains tentatively ascribed to Smithy’s ill-fated 1935 flight from England to Australia. These remains beg the question; did Sir Charles mistakenly crash land on the site of the future school?
3 A dog-eared script for Rumpole series, perhaps the result of Leo McKern retiring to the catacombs between classes to learn his lines.
4 Numerous brown paper bags containing paper currency perhaps secreted here by the famous former Premier of NSW during a tedious segment of a past speech night.
5 Share certificates in Offset Alpine Printers, origin unknown.
6 A bronze medal for swimming from the 1960 Rome Olympic Games.
7 Several academic gowns, one mortarboard with lime-based cement stains.
8 Rattan canes of uniform length, some broken in half.
9 Numerous small stretched canvases of uniform size.
10 A copy of Baudelaire’s Les Fleurs du mal with the inscription B. Searle on the frontispiece.
11 Numerous railway paraphernalia, some stamped ‘Science Department STHS’
12 Empty Ardeth cigarette packets (the sports storage area was near the original entrance to the catacombs).
13 Primitively rendered anatomical diagrams of unusual mating positions.
14 Chalk boxes containing charred sawdust.
15 Unexploded ordinance, chiefly acoustic shock devices.
16 Broken HB pencils.
17 Pictures of battleships showing axes of symmetry.
The school is seeking a heritage consultant to cast more light on these exiting discoveries and museums have been contacted regarding preservation of some articles before inclusion in the Bob Booth Archives Room.
7/12/2008 - Bruce Childs
Posted by misterkurtz
Wonderful stuff being unearthed here!
Mention in an earlier post of Bruce Childs sparked a memory of a desk in Room 2 with the inscription 'RIP Bruce Childs 1965 - no reference'. Two questions here:
* is this the Bruce Childs who later became an ALP senator? Or were Richo and Loosely our only politicians of that era....
*did anyone ever actually use their school reference?
7/12/2008 - WRT Shower stalls
Posted by gumby
I know I don't belong within this colloquy - me, a callow youth of '69 stamp - but must comment as follows.
Primo: the shower stall in the auditorium I knew not, but it was obviously some pansy, Thespian epigone of the bull-race shower stall in the subterranean gymnasium change-room, that space smelling richly of decaying socks and adolescent sweat: a dim basement our Septic cousins would label a 'locker room'.
It was there that I saw my first full-blown adolescent nude male. Rogue male, indeed. Pubes and all. Possibly a silver-back, pace Jane Goodall via Gary Larson. We puny First Formers, or perhaps just myself, were awed there one day to watch the sportive skylarking of several flannelled fools and muddied oafs, including the blond and stocky prefect Gary Wilson, running helter-skelter at this sheep-drench douche, and throwing themselves full-length, sliding the whole course of that ochre-tiled floor, having first soaped their half-ciliated chests, no doubt with Lifebuoy or Cashmere Bouquet.
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| The Bull-Race shower stall beneath the gymnasium. Door to access sub-Bong's Office area is shown to the left. |
Segundo: My reference was composed not by Bong, but by the motherly Mrs Garrick, school secretary. There was nothing to say of me, an undistinguished student, and thus it was a tissue - a slender tissue - of faint fictions, claiming among other inventions, that I played cricket and football, when in fact I feared and scorned both. Still, it was just enough to secure me, a gormless lad with a bare pass in the School Certificate, a junior clerical job in the basement of Thomson Publications, Chippendale, 1968, where I operated an addressograph machine, labeling wrappers for a number of trade papers including AARDS, the Australian Advertisers' Rate and Data Sheet, and Materials Handling Monthly.
My years at STHS had prepared me well for this bleak and Dickensian grind. Bing and Bob Booth had long ago predicted I would amount to nothing, and here I was.
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7/12/2008 - Childsplay
Posted by Geoff Kerr
The bee in the Childs family was Brian. Kevin was the one reputed to be the arborist with banner. Ian seems to be the only one to grace the hallowed halls during my time but rumors were rife of Childlike activities including on one occasion the saturation of the auditorium air conditioning with hydrogen sulphide. This caused a big stink and I hope Ian was not the whipping boy.
I live on the Far North Coast of NSW and I am in contact with another old boy - Bruce Shellard, who was one of the surfing fraternity. Bruce lived near the school (virtual spitting distance) and has intimate knowledge of after hours activities in the the now abandoned pool.
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| Fence at the corner of the pool. No longer any necessity for escape routes. It's no longer likely that anyone save the suicidal would break into the pool after hours. |
3/4/2009 - Bruce Shellard, where art thou? |
| Posted by gumby |
| My name is Ian Sharman and I attended STHS '63 - '68. I have returned to Australia after around 30 years to settle near Murwillumbah, NSW. This morning I googled Bruce Shellard and started reading your blog. I read the comments posted by Geoff Kerr and I would like to reach Bruce through him if possible. Would you pass along my email to Geoff? Regards, Ian Sharman |
